How Do I Get My Ex Boyfriend Back?
Are you feeling as if everything you do pushes your ex away more? Is this describing your circumstance to a tee? Are you wondering “how do I get my ex boyfriend back” at every turn? Here are some tips that will greatly increase your chances of getting back together with your ex boyfriend.
Obviously right now you are serious about saving or rekindling your relationship, which is what led you to this article to begin with. But if you are feeling overly anxious to get your ex back, you may be behaving in the wrong way, causing your ex to pull away naturally. It is human nature in general to resist this kind of pressure. Struggling against human nature is completely pointless, and it will only make matters worse.
Are you calling your ex too much, constantly writing him e-mails or text messaging him? Are you trying to make him feel sorry for you? If you are doing these things, stop! If you are asking yourself this question over and over, then you need to stop doing these things right now.
So how do I get my ex boyfriend back? Follow this strategy instead.
You are going to need to take a completely fresh approach. Begin by breaking contact off for a while, doing your own thing. During this time where there is no communication between you and your ex boyfriend, you can focus on ways that you can improve your own personal life, rather than focusing on the relationship issues at hand. This is going to be a challenging time, and it is going to require discipline to prevent you from returning to your old ways.
During this time, your ex is going to experience a shift in how he feels about you, since you will no longer be pursuing him. You may become mysterious to him in some ways, because he is not sure what you are doing or feeling. This is actually something that can work in your favor. Now your ex is in a position to actually miss you, which is not possible when you are smothering him.
You must remember that the key to this strategy and repairing a break up is to work with human nature rather than attempting to work against it. If you are wondering ” What can I do to get my ex boyfriend back”, now you should have a fairly basic understanding on how common mistakes can be avoided. Once you implement this basic strategy you can restore a balance and allow your ex to remember why he loved you in the first place.
Just keep yourself grounded and avoid smothering him. Make yourself appear mysterious and he will be reminded why he loved you in the first place. Play hard to get (don’t over do it) and let him make the first move, and you will come out on top. And then you will stop asking “How do I get my ex boyfriend back”.
December 15th, 2009 at 3:24 pm
Hi Tw,
I have watched both videos and loved them. You give great advice.
My boyfriend and i broke up 2 months ago. i have been heart broken over it. I want him back, but i feel like it is too late.We were talking by text for a while. Then we just stopped. I don’t want it to be too late. I really want him back. I did take note on what not to do or do. I do plan on doing all the suggestions you give in the video on If I blew it is there still a chance. After i do them what should i do next? im really trying not to panic. What should i do if he is seeing someone or just dating? i really want him back.
Thanks
DEBBIE
December 16th, 2009 at 10:21 pm
i try to get my ex back but it seems that he’s making up exuses to not get back together. but i could tell he still likes me becouse he stares at me all the time! what should i do!!!!
December 18th, 2009 at 1:41 pm
To Debbie,
First of all, I need to clear up some confusion. I am Dave. TW is my friend, collegue, and mentor. I only wish I knew as much as he does.
As for your question, there is a strategy to getting your ex back that requires more than a blog response. I suggest contacting TW himself at The Magic of Making Up.
To Zoe,
I am curious when he has time to stare at you? You need to take a break away from each other for a while. Like I said to Debbie, there is a strategy to this and one of the first strategies is getting away for a short time. After that, there are certain things you can do to improve your chances. I hate to sound like a broken record (does anyone remember records?), but The Magic of Making Up has the answers you need. I suggest checking it out.
Dave
March 5th, 2010 at 3:33 pm
What if my ex is still saying he loves me but he has a girlfriend do you think he means it? But I can tell that he’s not happy with her at all. His mom almost had a stroke and she didnt even care. His mom loses sleep and everything because she knows his girlfriend treats him like crap. He’s glad to have someone but he cant see that she’s treating him like crap. I love him to death but I just dont kno anymore. Should I keep trying to talk to him just as friends and see where it goes ?
I mean ya he tells me all the time that he doesnt see them going anywhere and then he tells me he wants to be with me and that he sees us having kids and getting married and all that goodie stuff. Help please..!!
~cassie~
March 5th, 2010 at 6:36 pm
Nice Job, thanks for this post.I will be sure to learn just from scanning this awesome post. If you could, can you possibly post more, it caught my attention straight away!
March 6th, 2010 at 6:04 pm
Cassie,
Let me tell you a story. When I was younger (many long years ago), I fell in love with a girl maned Debbie. She was the world to me.
Then one day, I found out she was seeing someone else. She said he didn’t mean anything to her. Basically it is your story in reverse. Do you know what happened? Nothing. Not for me, not for the other guy. Neither one of us got her.
I’m not saying that there is no hope for you. Far from it. But as long as he knows he has you following him around like a puppy dog, nothing’s going to change. You need to get away from him, at least for a while. And I mean completely away. No calling, no texting, nothing.
He needs to make a decision. Right now he has the best of 2 worlds. But you don’t need to tell him that. Let him figure it out for himself. If he really loves you, he will let you know with his actions.
One warning though. If he comes back to you, don’t let yourself fall into the same trap. You better know how to handle the situation or you will end up right back where you started.
The Magic of Making Up
May 31st, 2010 at 6:48 am
I really feel for people who are going through a bad patch in their relationships and living through a heart wrenching breakup. You can get your ex back no matter what- or how bad the situation may seem… There is help and hope out there. To get your ex and your love back; put back the passion in your relationship like it was at the beginning and you will succeed…
May 31st, 2010 at 6:55 am
I really feel for people who are going through a bad patch in their relationships and living through a heart wrenching breakup. You can get your ex back no matter what- or how bad the situation may seem… There is help and hope out there. To get your ex and your love back; put back the passion in your relationship like it was at the beginning and you will succeed…
August 22nd, 2010 at 8:32 pm
hi,
My ex and I have been apart for 6 months now. I havent tlked to him for 5 months. He has a new gf but they are falling apart and he just called and we talked for like a good 30 mins about random stuff. He said he misses me and wants to try to hang out. I was just wondering if now was a godd time to get him back.
August 23rd, 2010 at 9:21 am
To jj,
Is this a good time to get your ex back? Sure, why not? But don’t just dive in head first without testing the water.
What I mean by that is this. Did he call you because he misses you or because he’s having a rough spell with his current girlfriend and is using you as a plan B?
After 5 months, I think it’s safe to reconnect with him as an old friend. Unlike so many of these relationship gurus, I am against trying to break up a relationship no matter what you may think is happening to it. Unless you are there, you don’t know what is going on behind the scenes.
Go ahead and talk with him, but don’t have any expectations and don’t try to break up their relationship. Maybe he realizes he made a mistake with you or he may just need a shoulder to cry on. Just be a friend and let nature take it’s natural course.
October 31st, 2010 at 11:42 pm
Hi, I read this article and its exactly what i need to do to stop hurting myself. It has been a month since my boyfriend and I broke up, for his exgirlfriend drama and fighting over him to the point were I had to call up school security fo help. She was always telling me that she was with him when i wasnt, i ignored it the first couple of times, but then started asking him, he said no obiously, I believed him, but she kept talking. Finally he talked to me, saying it was too much, that he didnt want to put me through more trouble, he was going to stay away from me and ask her to stay away from him…. I respected was he said and didnt complain at all, I didnt call him, i didnt txt him, I didnt send him no e-mail,as we used when we were together, a week later he sent me an email asking me how was I and all that, since then. He is always emailing me and i respond, it doesnt matter how many times i tell myself no to respond i keep responding, and it just breaks me. Its like if he loves me and cares for me, but doesnt want to tell me straight what he really wants. It hurts me, he hurts me more like that, coming in and out of my life in seconds, it breaks me, but he doesnt realize that he is breaking me each time, and makes me cry. Please help, any good advice will be welcomed. :’(
November 1st, 2010 at 11:08 am
I am going through a difficult time right now. My ex(who has once already broken it off with me two years ago because he wasnt ready) has broken up with me again as of 2 days ago after a 1 week break. He says it’s trust issues even though I have never done anything to break them…he also says he is confused and doesnt know what hes doing in life. He said it would be better to be friends. I wish and hope to god we get back together because I love and care about him more than life.
Please help me!!! I dont know how to make him want me again, he says he loves and cares about me still but needs time. ;( im so depressed!!
ANDREA
November 1st, 2010 at 9:05 pm
You don’t mention the age range of these men, but here is something to think about.
When I was younger, I always heard how women mature sooner than men. Of course, at the time, I didn’t believe it. But now that I am a little older, I realize that it’s true. Most guys, until they are 24-25 years old or more, have the emotional capacity of a 12 year old. Their hormones are raging, but their mind doesn’t know what to do with them.
Keep this in mind when dealing with them and treat them accordingly. You can’t turn them over your knee and spank them, so you have to be patient. A good parent doesn’t give their child everything they want whenever they throw a tantrum.
If I’m confusing you, just give them some space and let them sort things out. If they come back to you, they are yours. If they don’t, they never were.
Go to The Magic of Making Up website and watch some of the videos. They could help you a lot.
November 18th, 2010 at 12:13 am
Thanks for the informative post, everyone’s input helps! Tagged this page on all my social sites will check back soon! All I can add at this point is that love stinks!
January 6th, 2011 at 1:02 am
My exboyfriend of 3 years broke up with me 6 months ago and started dating another girl a week after our break up. I didn’t talk to him for about a month when he started to text me. He has been texting me everyday and even texts me when he is with her. But he tells her he loves her. We have been going behind her back for about 4 months now. I am head over heels in love with him still. I don’t know what to do. I cannot say anything because I’m scared he will leave me even as a friend.
March 29th, 2011 at 3:11 pm
I’ve been in a one yr relationship with a wonderful man. Everything was going just perfect. Making plans for the future, however things changed a lot when his son came to live with him. I must admit it took me awhile to get use to it but even thought it bought some changes in our relationship we were good. About a month a go his ex-wife came back and she’s been trying to get him back. He assures me that he no longer loves her but he’s been very cold with me..I know didn’t help much with my constant fighting and nagging..So he told me we should start dating each other again. Well it’s been about two weeks and a first I was doing everything wrong..but i stop calling and texting me. I don’t understand him because there are days where he is constantly calling and texting me, telling me he loves me and doesn’t want to lose me and there are other days that he doesn’t call or text and if he does he’s cold. We went on two dates and we had a great time and we take kickboxing classes so i see him there too. I try to act like nothing is bothering me but inside i’m hurting. All i know is that i love him but don’t know what to do. Can you please give me advice?
May 7th, 2011 at 8:31 am
The guy that is about to break up with me is my first love. I’m completely heart broken. I made a mistake, and that resulted in him breaking up with me, or saying he will. I don’t know what to do. I read the entire blog, but for the rest I’d have to pay for it, for I have no money, and I feel sick in my heart, I just need a few pointers as what to do after I limit my contact with him, play hard to get, and give him the note. I’ve already made too many mistakes; please help me.
May 8th, 2011 at 3:23 pm
Chala,
You say that he has said he will break up with you. If he hasn’t broken up with you already, then he is using emotional blackmail to control you.
If the mistake you made warrants an apology, then apologize. After that, just be yourself and let the chips fall where they may. If he cares about you, he will come around.
June 13th, 2011 at 11:34 pm
I agree with most of what you said. Thanks. I’ll be sure to check back again soon.
September 13th, 2011 at 9:43 am
LOL, I’ve to say the on the web dating or electronic dating has come a very long way from the days of straight forward chat rooms. More and far more people are turning to on the web dating web sites to display potential dates.
December 3rd, 2011 at 6:56 am
Interesting article, I never thought of these ideas!
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